12 weeks 1 day

Wow- 12 weeks. I just can't believe how fast this pregnancy is going!! I know I said that back at 10 weeks but there's just something about hitting 12 weeks and being 1 week away from the 2nd trimester. I'm so excited for next Tuesday & Friday- Tuesday I have a hair appointment for a much needed trim and possibly a highlighting. Friday is my appointment where I'll get to hear the baby's heartbeat. I still can't get the heartbeat on the doppler- Little Frankenpebble just won't stay still long enough for the heartbeat to register on the doppler. Ahh well. Maybe the midwife will have a hard time getting the heartbeat & I'll have an impromptu ultrasound :-)

On Face.boo.k a friend of mine suggested I like this page called Baby Half Off. They post things about baby items on sale. The one day they had diaper bags on sale. Kalencom Eleanor Collection Diaper Bags- you can see them here. They're usually $90 (OMG!) but were on sale for $36. The peacock one caught my eye and I had to have it. I decided to look for it on Ebay just to see if I could get it cheaper. It was about $11 more on Ebay with free shipping. I thought shipping was $6something on Baby Half Off but it ended up being like $15.80 making the bag over $50. WTF?! So I got the one on Ebay and it should be here tomorrow. I am soo excited to get it!

I've been knitting Delilah a blanket to replace the one I originally made for her that she ruined. I need to get it done by the time we find out if we're having a boy or girl (if the little stinker cooperates!). I decided I didn't like any of the blankets in my one book and couldn't find any that I liked searching on the yarn sites. So I bought a new book and found 2 I like. I'm hoping I can pull it off because they look a little complicated but we'll see!

11 weeks 3 days

Nothing much has really been going on- I've been feeling the same: occasional nausea, frequent urination, mild heartburn a few times a week, and hungry just about any time I'm not nauseated. My next appointment is two weeks from yesterday- I can't wait to finally hear the heartbeat!

I say finally because I bought a fetal doppler. I decided that after I saw two more ladies leaving my due date board I wanted to get one. I looked in to this one brand- H.i Be.be- and it was so expensive new. I just couldn't justify the expense for just peace of mind. I looked on ebay and found one for super cheap- of course it was used but hey, it was in good working order. I mentioned it to John and I think he would've been up for it if I hadn't mentioned the board. He thinks it puts funny ideas in to my head and sometimes it does. The next day after I had talked to him about the doppler I had brought it up again that night. I had found another doppler for $35 + free shipping buy-it-now. I asked him if he would be upset if I got one and he really didn't answer me one way or another. So I decided to look at the ones I had seen earlier. One was up for auction with a few hours to go. I was going to bid on that one toward the end and if I didn't win that one I was going to just buy the buy-it-now one. I had seen that someone had inquired about the buy-it-now one so I was concerned that I would wait for the one on auction, not win it, and then go to get the buy-it-now one and it would be gone. So I just bought the one that was readily available for purchase.

It came a few days later and I was so excited to try it out (although I fully knew that I might not find the heartbeat or even hear it because I was only 10w5d). Then a thought occurred to me... the probe probably touched that gals "lady hair" so I definitely needed to clean it off with rubbing alcohol. I went to clean it off and noticed there was some residue from the ultrasound gel she used. Um, ew!! Come on people- clean your stuff off before you send it to the winning bidder.

I've been able to find the heartbeat but I haven't been able to hear it. I don't know if it's because the baby moves before I can really lock on to the heartbeat or if I'm not pressing hard enough or who knows what. It's neat to see that number flash across the screen for even a second & know it's the baby.

I'm really excited to find out what we're having. John & I prefer a girl for different reasons but obviously a boy would be loved. However I have this ridiculous fear that I'd be disappointed to find out it was a boy. I wouldn't be and there's nothing wrong with a boy- we'd love what we had no matter what. But I do know some women who also feel the same. I'm afraid to even tell someone about that fear because a lot of people wouldn't understand. Or might take it the wrong way like there's something wrong with one gender or another. The most important thing to me is that this baby is healthy regardless of the sex and I don't want people to think I wouldn't love my son should we have a boy.

Mainly I just want to see our little Frankenpebble (don't ask) again!

10 weeks 0 days

10 weeks today- I just can't believe how fast it seems to be going as of late. I felt like the first few weeks just crawled! I think it's because I was anxiously awaiting my appointment. It's unreal to think in 3 weeks I'll be 13 weeks... and my appointment will be 2 days after I'm 13 weeks. I can't wait to hear the baby's heartbeat! Nothing much really new happening- I haven't felt too nauseated (well I did yesterday). Mostly I just pee a lot and have mild heartburn about every day now. Ugh! Very annoying.

I took a new belly pic today but it looks more like a fat pic instead LoL It's a little bigger- or more like I can't suck it in as much ;-)

The pink shirt is 8 weeks, the grey one is from today

8 weeks 5 days

I had my appointment today- finally! It went really well... except for the part where Delilah just wouldn't cooperate. But I have to cut her some slack- we had waited awhile and it was her nap time. Baby looks good and is measuring 2 days ahead. My EDD is now 3/23. I have to have a repeat c-section- Dr. S who did my first c-section put in his report that he did NOT recommend that I try for a VBAC. Which I knew because my midwife A had told me when I went in for my yearly after I had Delilah. When she told me this though she said that when I get pregnant again we can discuss a VBAC if I want to. Anyway, so yesterday she relayed this information again and I asked her if she knew why (which I had asked her before too). She didn't because Dr. S didn't put in a reason. She said that she respects his decision so that meant no discussions. I guess in a way it takes a small weight off my shoulders because then I had the decision made for me and I don't have to worry about what I should do. I'm not sure when it'd be scheduled for but I'm hoping we can schedule it for St. Patrick's Day. No, I'm not Irish- I'm German. But I just think it'd be neat. My next appointment is in September- I can't wait to hear the baby's heartbeat!

Baby Williams (I love our printer/copier/scanner!)

8 week 6 day belly pic

7 weeks 6 days

I've made it- well almost. Monday is our appointment. FINALLY! I'll be 8 weeks 3 days. I cannot wait to get in there & see the baby. I just pray that everything is ok (which I'm sure it is since I'm still having preggo symptoms LoL). I'm really excited to have John & Delilah there too. When I had my first appointment with Delilah, John wasn't able to make it. But my mom was so that was really cool to have her there to see the baby :-)

The past few days I haven't been nauseated at all- just hungry ALL the time. Like I just ate a Fiber One bar a few minutes ago & I'm still hungry. Argh! I do try to make sure I eat healthy things since I'm so hungry all the time. That's kind of hard when I want salty stuff & the only thing salty we really have is chips. But I'm happy to say that I don't have those too often.

I've been thinking about having a c-section as opposed to trying for a VBAC. Even though I've always felt cheated of having a vaginal birth with Delilah, I was 100% sure I would go with the c-section. There's a few perks like knowing when your baby is coming and not having to go through labor just to have a c-section anyway. I was also planning on having the doctors "take care of things" while they were in there. With a c-section I could go in to it well rested and not exhausted from having labored for how long. *sigh* This is so hard! With a VBAC there are risks- like you could have uterine rupturing. However I've seen this risk has a pretty low percentage. With a c-section things would be easy however it's still a major abdominal surgery with a longer recovery time than a vaginal birth. I don't know if I'll be lucky again to go on my own this time and so close to my due date which would mean I'd probably end up getting sectioned anyway because I know they won't want me going a week past my due date (because of the PCOS) and they won't (I don't think) induce someone who's had a c-section. I think you're only a good candidate for a VBAC if you go naturally.

Even though I am filled with doubt I'm thinking that we'll just end up going with the c-section. There's just too many what-ifs for me to feel comfortable. Argh... the decisions! Thankfully I really don't have to give this too much thought since I have awhile to decide (agonize over) our final verdict.

Tomorrow I am taking my first belly pic- stay tuned for the posting of that picture plus the ultrasound picture!

7 weeks 3 days

The past two days I have been worried- I haven't been feeling like I'm peeing as much or that I'm as hungry as I usually am (mostly in the morning when I'm SUPER hungry) or nauseated. I almost wished that I would throw up so I would know little pebble is ok. Crazy huh? LoL Today though I got some relief- well so to speak since I felt nauseated most of the afternoon and was afraid I was going to throw up on the way back to take John dinner (I didn't). I've been feeling as though I can't possibly wait for my appointment- now a week from tomorrow. But today I felt calmer about things & I'm pretty sure I can wait patiently. Of course that *is* today- who knows what tomorrow will bring ;-)

I was going through this pregnancy planner I had kept with Delilah- mostly I used it for my appointments & stuff I wanted to put on my registry. The rest of the book was left unused. If I hadn't gotten it for free it would have been a hefty waste of money. Well $20 but still- I used about $5 worth maybe. Anyway I saw that I had my first appointment with Evangeli.cal when I was 8 weeks 6 days. This time I'll be 8 weeks 3 days. Of course that appointment wasn't that bad to wait for since I got to see Delilah when I was 6 weeks 5 days at the fertility clinic at Ge.isinger.

It's so weird- I have food aversions this time & I didn't last time. Now that's not the weird part. The weird part is that I have a hard time looking at food in television commercials. It was all I could do not to gag when different commercials came on showing slabs of steak, chicken, shrimp, burgers, etc. I have to look away because I seriously feel ill. I'm so weird LoL

6 weeks 6 days

What's in a name? For this little one's name I want it to be something unique but not crazy weird. I see names people name their children on the Gei.sing.er website and it's like WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?! I mean come on- don't these people think past these kids' childhood and to adulthood? Do you really think that someone is going to want to hire a person named Cashmyre? Seriously people. We're pretty set on a boy name- I only like one and don't have other options. Although I feel like I should look at other boy names because what if we have a boy & he doesn't come out looking like the name we picked? For girl names I had one I liked from our list when I was pregnant with Delilah. Then I thought of a 2nd one I liked. And yesterday I thought of yet a 3rd one I liked. I know I don't have to worry about this yet and I'm really not- I'll think about it more seriously after we find out what we're having (not until November- ugh!).

Another thing that I've been thinking about that was brought up on my due date board is when will Delilah come to the hospital? I'm going to have a repeat c-section & will be in recovery for an hour. I won't get to even see the baby until I go back to my room. I thought I'd have Delilah be there right away but as I thought about it more I figured that after I'm brought back to my room I want to bond with the baby a little before Delilah comes. I don't want her to be there & feel like mommy isn't paying attention to her. I'd like to have some time with the baby so I don't feel like I'm being torn trying to bond with the baby & pay attention to Delilah. So I think what we'll do is maybe have her come to the hospital after her nap (if I get sectioned in the morning). If I have an afternoon section we'll have her come in after dinner. Again- not something I need to worry about now but definitely something I'd like to get thinking about.

I found the cutest pregnancy planner on Ebay. It's called Prego Planner and it has all the stuff in it that I'm looking for. For Delilah I had this neat thing called The Essential Pregnancy Organizer and also a calendar planner that Ash had gotten me. I decided not to get the pregnancy organizer this time around but I did want a calendar planner. I can't find one anywhere like the one Ash had gotten me. I came across this which is a combination of the organizer & the planner. While I don't *need* all the things in it I would like to have it.